"That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:4-5

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Are You Trying to Bless...or Impress?

Every now and then, it is good to step back and take a look at the intentions of our hearts.  Sometimes, we don't even realize that our hearts are not in the right place.  We think we're doing something for a specific reason, but really...we're not.

Back when I was a new wife and mother, I did pretty much everything for the wrong reasons.  At that time in my life, everything was about me looking good.  I did what I did to get a compliment, make someone jealous, or to get someone to want to be like me.  I know...it sounds terrible and sad, but that is the truth of who I was at the time. One thing that I definitely did with the wrong motives was practice hospitality.

I was all about myself, and trying to look "perfect".  I wanted to show people that I could serve an amazing meal with a wonderful dessert, in a perfectly clean house, wearing a beautiful outfit and perfectly styled hair and make-up.  Before company would arrive, I would be a wreck getting ready.  What if something was out of place?  They might not think I'm perfect!  Obviously, it was all about ME.

It makes me a little nauseous thinking about all of that now.  How wrong my motives were!

The Lord calls us to hospitality.  Why?  Because we are to be the hands and feet of Jesus to others.  Because we are to bless people.  It's not about impressing them, it's about blessing them!  It's about humbling ourselves, letting people into our homes and lives, and finding ways that we can bless THEM and be Jesus to them.

Yes, I believe that having a clean, orderly home is a part of being a good, efficient homemaker.  So is cooking delicious meals.  But...it's NOT about making me look good.  It's about having a comfortable, tidy home to welcome people into, making them feel at home with a nice cup of coffee or a hot cooked meal.  They should see the love of Jesus shining through me in my actions.  I am not the center of attention--Jesus is!

These days, I do what I do out of obedience to the Lord.  I want to love on people, and show them the love of Jesus in my home.  I want them to be warm and comfortable and cared for, and I want them to want to come back again.  And someday, I want to be able to look into Jesus' eyes and hear him say, "well done, good and faithful servant."

Look closely at your heart.  What are your motives?  Are you trying to bless....or impress?


  1. I was just like you when I was younger. My mother was terribly concerned with what people thought so she raised me to do a really great job of making things "look" a certain way. Having a lot of children certainly cured me of any notions I had that I could be the "perfect" hostess!

    Wonderful thoughts here! Thank you for sharing them and admonishing women to take a deeper look!

  2. What a great post. I definitely try to bless. In fact, I struggle with what might be the opposite end of the spectrum. I am always fearful of doing things (from my heart) and looking like I am bragging. I find myself afraid of hurting other people's feelings. :)
    folowing you from a Wise Woman.

  3. Good food for thought! Sometimes I check my motives by asking myself, "If I were to receive no credit for this, would I still do it just to be a blessing?" Many times, my pride says, "Probably not."

  4. April, you and I are so very alike! I used to love the comments about me being "Like Martha Stewart". I lived for those comments! While I still like to do things to the best of my abilities, I more want to remind myself of the "why" of hospitality...and to pray for constant humility.

    Thank you for the wonderful post, and the honesty attached! We all need to be reminded of these things.

    God Bless you!

  5. Wonderful post! So good to "meet" you today, finding you at "A Wise Woman Builds Her Home." I look forward to visiting again!

  6. I found you from A Wise Woman Builds Her Home, too. It is so nice to find like minded women! I am also gluten free as I have Celiac. I have been in your shoes and this really hit home for me. I have been working on blessing and not impressing. I LOVE God's timing. :)

  7. nice post...thank you for sharing...happy holidays..blessings soraya

  8. A beautiful post..and so true. To examine ourselves, constantly, is so important. He deserves all the glory from our deeds...not ourselves.

    I like how you said that you want to *bless* not *impress*! I will keep that snippet in my mind continually to remember! thank you for it!